“Real love is motivation for growth, understanding and compassion. Real love drives us to be better people who rise above petty difficulties and fleeing emotions. People who do whatever it takes to nurture what they hold dear.” ~ Kimby Maxson
I know I write a lot about love. Many writers do. Probably because there are so many aspects to love that can be pondered as well as how it can be shared in different ways with different people.
This post is about romantic love and meeting “the right one”. For as long as I can remember, my mom always told me that when I met “the right one”, I would know. But do we really know? Can there be many “ones”, just sometimes timing or circumstances make them not be “the one right now”? Kimby Maxson, the author of the quote above, wrote an article about “Is He/She The One? Ask These Two Questions” which inspired me to write this blog post.
Because I’m female and a writer, I over-think and over-analyze everything, and here is an article that whittles it down to two questions. Amazing.
The first question is “Do you love this person?”. This seems a simple enough question, but the kind of love Ms. Maxson is referencing is the kind of love that would make you want to “give this person half your paycheck, the last bite of something good, a kidney”. It’s like asking yourself if you love the person to where you would put their needs and wants before your own. Other similar questions would be - would you go to the ends of the earth to be with this person? Is it someone you can live without?
The second question is “Are both my life and my partner’s life better because of our relationship?”. That’s a big and important one. Does your relationship allow you to strive to be the best you you can be as an individual, continuing to learn and grow, but also to learn and grow as a couple? Experiencing and learning things together and supporting each other in what we do on our own, like our careers or hobbies, is necessary to thriving as individuals and as a couple. Having your own friends that you spend time with is good as it makes you appreciate your partner so much more. It’s a wonderful thing when you just can’t wait to get home to be with and love on your partner.
So there it is. Two questions to consider that would need to be answered in the affirmative by both people for there to be a “forever after” relationship. There is no time requirement as to when the questions can be asked, but I think by the time that they are, the couple will both know the answer. I love the simplicity of it and look forward to the day when I can ask those two questions of the man who is “the one” for me. ~ © 2015 T. A. Garcia